Monday, February 7, 2011

In case you were wondering, I'm still crazy.

Back in October of 2009 (which was really just 4 posts ago because of my lazy ass) I mentioned I was getting prescribed. Well, Monday was one of those days where the adverse effects sneak up on me-- paxiflu. Most people who take or have taken Paxil experience some sort of side effect, most notoriously, withdrawal.

For the record, other than not being generally hungry, I have never experienced withdrawal from marijuana. Just my prescriptions. Anyway, I ran out of refills and had to have it called in so I missed a day... maybe two (my memory is shit, I may have forgotten to take it the day before). It starts with me acting like a bitch. Then I get night sweats and chills then nausea, vomiting if I try to take my meds, dizziness/lightheadedness, general shit. Legit, one of the worst things I experience and all I can do is try to sleep it off and keep down a bland meal so I can attempt to reintroduce a low-dose. And smoking doesn't always help; it'll calm the nausea but make the dizziness worse, helps me sleep but make me hungry for foods I can't be eating.

My poor boyfriend hates to see me sick, he's such a sport. He sat for hours in the dark so I could sleep and made me rice. I'm on the up now, having a morning bowl, watching Parenthood. Ultimately, the meds work. Since October 2009 a lot of things have happened-- not all good, some extremely dramatic and problematic, and super emotional. But I think I'm okay now. I'm not weepy or overly emotional, I don't have the severe mood swings, and I typically feel pretty good about myself and my job and my situation. It really has taken all this time to get the meds right, and to get to this point, which was probably why blogging fell through the cracks, it's a pretty intense experience, if not just downright exhausting.

Who knew taking care of yourself and eating right was so difficult? I mean, I've been up for two hours now and the task of breakfast just seems so daunting. The munchies will get the best of me soon though.

Stay Stoned. ♥

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