Act Like a Lady.

 In case you didn't know, Lady Stoners are everywhere. Aside from me being one of the greatest (yeah, I'm full of myself) I know quite a few ladies who feel the same way as I do about marijuana. Which, apparently, society thinks is pretty unladylike. For a long time, stoner culture has revolved around Jay & Silent Bob, rappers like Biggie and Tupac, and Josh from Clueless. But in modern women's stoner culture, weed plays a different role. Now, weed is not my life (obviously, cause I don't have enough readers here to earn money from it) but it has a huge role in my life.

My number one thing to do while high is shop. Online or in the store, I'm blazing before I'm buying. I always pick out the best stuff and create the best outfits when I'm high. I have an obsession with Juicy Couture Jewelry (additional 40% off!) and shoes, and the Gap. I love the Gap. Mostly cause they make size 00 and I'm a scrawny little thing. Last week I stopped at Juicy to check out the sale and I bought an orange studded leather cuff. The next week, I went back and bought one in every color AND a blazer. Yeah.  On September 13th Missoni launches their Missoni for Target line and you bet your sweet ass that I will be online at midnight trolling for goodies. I may even pop into the store when it opens on the 13th, but I'll probably have to fight a bitch. When I'm not shopping, I'm thinking about shopping. Or reading about shopping. In addition to my normal magazines, I read The House of Gucci as well as Deluxe: How Luxury Lost it's Luster. The latter really opened my mind to the quality and production of goods, a good read if you're into fashion, marketing, or craftsmanship. The rest of my summer reading list are a stack of various September issues. I love magazines. 

Another one of my Lady Stoner activities is cooking. Mostly just to enjoy whatever I've made at the end, but sometimes I have to look at the fridge and come up with something to feed myself. When I was in high school I had three very good 'stoner' (I really don't like the negative connotation of that word) friends. Pretty much every day would be spent in my back yard, swimming, smoking, and making up straight up ridiculous shit. Now, one of those 'stoners' is another Lady Stoner. Perhaps for me, the greatest smoking partner to ever live (except, her house was always really cold and never had good snacks, sorry girl.) She and I spent hours in the pool, even if I was just sitting on the edge because there were no lines in the pool (a story for another time), we'd be there making up games and talking about how Nutella is the spread of the Gods and the only good thing to come out of New Jersey. Swimming really builds up an appetite, and I have some ridiculous stories and recipes that when I type them out, just don't make sense. One invented recipe has withstood the test of time, and if I had a microwave... oh, man. I wish I could remember how we came up with that name. Anyhow, here's the recipe, just try it on.

Spidels

Eggo Cinnamon Toast Waffles
Butter
Marshmallows
Cinnamon/Sugar

Prepare Eggo's according to the directions on the box
Place marshmallows on top and microwave until melted
Sprinkle with Cinnamon Sugar, Sprinkles, or whatever sweet topping you have
DEVOUR.

Now you can leave them pizza style or you can separate the mini-toasts and make a little sandwich out of it.

In my next post... More about Lady Stoners, Interviews with a few Lady Stoners and of course, more weed.

Stay Stoned ♥

Fly like paper get high like planes.

My favorite place in the world to be high? (Besides curled up in my chaise lounge, reading a gook book...) The airport. For the last few years I've always gotten high before traveling and flying. People tell me I'm stupid with all the TSA regulations but I'm never holding, just high, so I don't see the harm in an extra-chill passenger.

I probably would have flipped the fuck out at the crazy check-in line if I hadn't have been high. I almost didn't make my flight. I constantly have to be conscious of my anxiety in places like airports with large congregations of people because it's really easy for me to become flustered or overwhelmed. I got through security with no problems despite the fact that I didn't have a plastic bag for my liquids, (but FYI if you're wearing door-knocker earrings they will set off the metal detector) and got on the plane and passed out for the whole first part of my flight. I'm in Philadelphia now, tired as fuck and just had a wonderful munchies session.

That's the other wonderful thing about the airport, SNACKS. My first stop was Chick-Fil-A, could you think of anything better? I ordered a chicken biscuit (It's still too early for lunch) and a medium lemonade. Nom, nom, nom. After that I strolled over to Sabarro and got a large caesar salad and I'm eyeing a Philadelphia pretzel from the cart across the way. Hopefully all this food will put me to sleep so I don't have to endure the next 5 hours sitting in that tiny plane. Maybe I'll watch The Wackness again on my laptop, I can't get enough of that movie for some reason.

Anyways, In about seven hours I'll be with my pot smoking family and my perma-baked Sandy sitting in the pool sipping on a Blue Moon, hopefully. Let's hope for the best shall we? I'm picking up an ounce as soon as I roll into the Dub C and this week I'm hoping to put together that joint-rolling tutorial (or at least find the best one out there), muse about having a stoner family, and my favorite things to do while stoned in the pool. Expect inside jokes, copious amounts of weed and hopefully lots of pictures.