wahh.

Finally bought bud yesterday after 3 days of none. Thank god. I need to stop drinking. I got wayyyyy too fucked up on Sunday and blacked out, and broke a bunch of shit and lost my shoes, my scarf, and my wallet which was thankfully returned. I'm getting just confucked. New friends, new people, new experiences. I'm in over my head I think. Sunday was a reality check, and unfortunately I'm already showing signs of acute alcoholism so I'm freaking out. Thanks Dad. Speaking of Dad, he's dying or sick or something? How am I supposed to react to this? Smoke. Duh.

When I went to the hospital Monday morning (severe dehydration/I got scared cause everyone said it was like I was on drugs)they basically told me to smoke it up and that the worst that can happen is indegestion and the munchies. Which is what happened last night. I ate: two bowls of my roomie's delicious spaghetti alfredo with half a dozen turkey meatballs, a fruit and cheese plate from the unnamed coffee shop in which I work and some grapes and an apple and then like 4 glasses of milk and a pint of ice cream. I fell asleep on the couch with terrible indegestion/heartburn. Great.

As for everything else in life, well it doesn't stop. I'm hoping that the emotional stuff will settle down now that I have a grip on life and some bleak hope that everything will work itself out.

Coming this week if I don't kill myself: Voting and Question 2, and this terrible smokers cough. Someone buy me a bong.

Hello allll.

So I'm slightly drunk thanks to my fabulous new roommate and sitting in my Unnamed Coffee Shop where I work taking advantage of the free internet for us lowly employees. I can't type for shit right now.

Can I tell you what really grinds my gears? Fucking not having a steady dealer. My old guy 'isn't selling anymore' and between moving in and shit I can't find the time to get over to my temporary replacement dealer across town. And I realllllly want to buy from him. Not only for my sake, but for his. He's a new friends boyfriend and just lost his job. (BTW, it's fucking freezing in here and I'm shivering drinking some green tea lemonade freezing my nips off, it's kinda hot). I need someone who always has stock, knows his shit and is nice enough that he will never rip me off. But never fear! College is near again! And my old dealers and good friends are coming back into town. One of my old dealers actually smoked me out last night, which was FABULOUS. He's such a nice guy. And of course I was joint-rolling queen of the night. You'll be amazed at how many self-proclaimed "stoners" don't know how to roll a joint. Jesus.

Well, in addition to smoking I drank a whole bottle of wine and made out with a gay guy who tried to convince me he was straight. Really fucked me up, you know? But, yet another reason why I like pot better, I have no desire to make out with gay men or do anything but eat. Anyways, sorry this post sucks. I'm so out of my element here. I don't have internet in my apartment lately (we had to return the old router Friday and are getting hooked up Tuesday, so sorry for this crappy post but I want to update everyone and say that Blazing Life will be back in full swing on Tuesday with a music review and some other things I've been thinking up. Stay Stoned, y'all.

It's raining and I'm high and looking out my window onto the bike path and a woman with an umbrella and 3 small dogs in raincoats come waltzing through.

The stoner part is, I didn't actually notice that the dogs were wearing raincoats, nor did it strike me as unusual until long after they had escaped my view. But really, it was so cute! 3 little dogs, one was definitely a pug, in rain coats! In all primary colors with little collars and hoods!

Certainly brightens my day. And I've had a pretty shitty one too. As I was getting dressed for work I got into a fight with my best friend, and with it went my weekend plans. When I left for work it started pouring rain. I only live a short 3 minute walk to my job so I figured I would be okay, but somehow in that 3 minute walk to work my shoes and socks got soaked and the entire front of my work capris were wet. I worked my whole shift with wet shoes, which may have been why I dropped a stack of plates, spilled iced coffee all over the bar, dropped a half-full pitcher of frappucino base which fell right onto the floors I had just mopped. I would have been okay with that, but then my co-worker and I proceeded to kick 3 people out of the unnamed cafe at which I work. I got to use my mom voice today. I first yelled at this bum to stop fighting with some kid and then yelled at the kid and his friend for running around the cafe. No one who witnessed my yelling/kicking out gave me any shit. They must have seen the bad day all over my face. On my break I called my mom to vent and maybe get some sympathy, but she was still pissed because I told her I got my nose pierced on Tuesday. So she got after me and with the weight of it all I just kind of cried for a minute. When I got back on the floor not even sampling our new smoothie (which is my favorite thing in the world, ever to do at work) made me happier.

But I'll tell you what did make me happier. Getting off 10 minutes early, apologizing to my mom, and busting out the bong. I like saving smoking out of the bong for days like these. It makes smoking even more pleasant, cause I get to change up my routine.

I'm too high to keep typing. I lost my train of thought. But it's a good thing, because today has been so long, and shitty. I'm going to go watch a movie now.

I've found it!

If you're like me, you anticipate being hungry or thirsty and eat while smoking. I usually end up satisfied, but smoking always ruins the flavor of whatever I'm eating or drinking.

Not anymore! When I got off of work today at an unnamed coffeshop and I came home and started smoking I realized my iced venti no syrup green tea lemonade actually tasted better with the flavor of pot. Can you imagine that? I immediately called my best friend Sandy, (the only other person I know who smokes more than I do) and excitedly told her my discovery.

Do you know what she told me? She hates tea. Who hates tea? Either way, you should try it out, not only is it utterly delicious and refreshing (I've had 4 today, refills are only $ 0.53) but it has made smoking a little more enjoyable (I didn't think that was possible) but watch out, it has more caffeine than you would think. I had some pretty late the other day and didn't go to sleep til 4 A.M.